Thursday, November 29, 2012

A Crazy Day for a Crazy Daisy

Today was a crazy day. I usually don't mind them but this one was just silly.

The morning started fine until I arrived at work....

I work as a teachers aide at a local elementary school. Students do/say crazy things, the students parents do/say crazy things, and even some teachers baffle me.

An aide in my area (2nd and 3rd grade reading intervention) was out today. We got a substitute teacher. I don't know what rock they found this guy under but he was completely clueless. 

First off he was wearing his letter jacket.....from 2003. I understand you are proud of your academic letter jacket but I think its time to pack it away. I packed my sports letter jacket away before I left for college. It was just time to say good bye to high school. I was trying REALLY hard not to judge.

Secondly, whenever I tried to explain to him what he needed to teach the children (again, 2nd and 3rd grade below level readers) he acted so confused. One thing was to just have the kids do repeated timed readings on the iPad, he didn't have to do anything, but he was still confused. He was looking at me as if I spouted an extra head and wanted him to teach quantum physics.

The best was the he KEPT FALLING ASLEEP.....with students right in front of him. This happened several times. The kids even noticed and were telling each other all about it at recess and lunch.  There were 6 women in the room who could not stop laughing. Who does this at a job?  We even tried being loud with instruction and reading to keep him awake but it didn't help. When he wasn't sleeping he was playing on his iPod  Touch. Well, he fell asleep one too many times because one group had a student in it that is the principals grandson!! OOPSIE!

I doubt that sub will be back anytime soon.

*Just so you don't think I am completely heartless, this was a healthy male without any medical problems. We are a small town and he has relatives that work in our school system that vouched for his healthiness (not sure if that is even a word)!!*

The next (and hopefully last) crazy thing was a conversation with my 9 year old daughter:
**We believe in open conversations and expressing yourself in our household, so please don't be offended**

EVE: Mom, did you know that I can cough, sneeze, and fart at the same time?

ME:  Really? Well, wait until you are my age and have had 2 kids then you will be able to cough, sneeze, fart, and wet yourself at the same time!!

EVE (laughing hysterically): Gross!!

I didn't have the heart to tell her, that as the 2nd child, most of my bodily problems are her fault!!

Well, I guess I need to mention that I did NOT win the Powerball.....Crazy Day strikes again.

As I just finished typing the above and before I could click "Publish", I decided to play fetch with the dog. He is very small, a yorkie/shih tzu. He has a 1/2 of a little tennis ball that he LOVES. I threw it frisbee style from the kitchen to the dining room. It landed, without bouncing, RIGHT IN A LIT CANDLE!!! Not kidding!

I had to RUN to get the candle blown out before my whole house went up in flames (I was picturing it in my mind as I was sprinting in slo-mo to get there). 

Needless to say, Emmett's ball is now completely covered in evergreen scented candle wax. Poor puppy just lost his favorite toy. 

Is it a full moon?

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